Give me the Song and I'll sing it von moko-chan (J2/RPS) ================================================================================ Kapitel 7: White Lie -------------------- Song: Foreigner – White Lie White Lie Jared sat in the kitchen, harbouring a cup of strong coffee in his hands and biting his lip. It was the middle of the night, it was his free weekend – but he couldn’t sleep. It had been the way Jensen had looked at him when he’d whished him good night that had kept him tossing and turning for hours until he finally decided to give up and get up. It had been the feeling that something was off between them that had kept him wide awake when he should be nearly dead with exhaustion from their current shooting schedule. He hadn’t turned on the light in the kitchen, had brewed a cup of coffee in the semi-darkness of the digital watch on the stove and had sat down on the kitchen counter with the strongest coffee he had ever made for himself and not for Jensen. The feeling Jensen was keeping something from his had been growing on him in the last weeks, and while Jared knew that they were still the best of friends, he was beginning to wonder. Why would Jensen think he had to keep secrets from him? One little white lie One white lie surrounds us One white lie won’t stop the love That I feel around us It was the way Jensen moved around him that had changed. Like Jared was fragile – like he would break if Jensen touched him too … too hard. And wasn’t that the joke of the year … to think of Jared as fragile. Jared missed the slaps on his shoulders, the bumping of hips when Jensen wanted to get him out of the way and didn’t have his hands free to just shove. A few weeks ago, Jensen would have punched Jared in the stomach for a crude joke … yesterday all he did was grin in that adorably shy way of his. Jared didn’t know what he had done, but it was like the years they had spent as friends had gone with the wind. Suddenly Jensen was shy around him again, kept his distance … blushed, when they accidentally touched. Darling, do you think about me? What I feel for you – don’t you ever doubt me You see the lock on the door of this heart – but you hold the key I need the trust you can give Is there something that you need from me? Jared heard the shuffling of pawns across the tiled floor of the kitchen, and when he could make out a pair of pointy ears, he managed a week smile. “Hey, girl – did I wake you?” Sadie produced a whiny little sound, put her head in his lap, and he gingerly petted it. “I’m sorry sweetie – try and go back to sleep,” he whispered, Sadie grunted and pushed her head towards his hand, and Jared sighed. “Yeah, I know. Should be trying to sleep myself. But he’s just so … I don’t know. The only thing I know is that something’s wrong. But if he were mad at me, he’d just tell me so. He always does.” Jared knew he was babbling, but he didn’t care – after all, it was his dog he was talking to. “It’s like he … like he was afraid of something. It’s driving me nuts, girl … not to know what’s up with him. He should know I wouldn’t be mad … no matter, what it is. He should know he can tell me anything.” One little white lie One white lie surrounds us One white lie won’t stop the love That I feel around us “Jared?” Jared stiffened in his chair, looked up to find Jensen standing in the door of the kitchen – dressed in flannel pyjama bottoms, with his glasses on and rubbing his forehead. “What are you doing up in the middle of the night … making coffee?” Jensen padded closer, sniffing a little, and Jared knew it was the smell of coffee that had woken him. “Sorry,” he mumbled and stared down to Sadie’s big brown eyes, because all of a sudden he couldn’t look Jensen in the eyes. It felt weird to be alone with him in the kitchen at this time of night – when the light of the moon that fell in through the window did amazing things to his pale skin, made it look soft and touchable, and made his eyes gleam behind his glasses. Jared had never felt this way around his friend, and the need to touch was stronger than ever before. Secrets, and the way we keep them Between you and me Promise we’ll never need them I can see something so true – no one else could ever see And I’ll never chance losing you I believe my heart – I hear what it’s telling me Jensen came a little closer, took the cup of coffee from Jared’s hands and took a little sip. “This is way too strong for you, Jay – you will be up for days,” he said quietly, and Jared, who had looked up when his cup had been taken from him, opened his mouth without knowing what to say. Jensen was so close, Jared could count his freckles in the dark. “Can’t sleep, no matter what,” he answered with a little shrug, but Jensen didn’t give him back his cup. Jensen hopped on the counter right next to Jared, so that they were facing each other, and spun the cup between his long, slender fingers. Jared watched like transfixed, felt his breath hitch for no reason at all, and his eyes followed the cup up to Jensen’s mouth, stared at the way his lips touched the rim and pressed against it, and Jared’s mouth went dry. One little white lie One white lie surrounds us One white lie won’t stop the love That I feel around us “You sure you wanna drink that?” Jared asked with a voice that didn’t sound like his, and Jensen’s eyes brightened a little. “Smells too good to resist.” The moment felt like Jared could ask Jensen anything, and Jensen would answer with nothing but the truth, but suddenly Jared was afraid what that truth might be. There had to be a reason Jensen was keeping secrets, and Jared wasn’t so sure anymore he could face those reasons. “What’s keeping you up, Jay?” Jensen suddenly asked. “Should be out like light after today.” Jared shrugged and avoided eye-contact, and Jensen let out a little sigh. “You noticed, didn’t you?” One little white lie One white lie tears us apart One white lie won’t stop the love That’s waiting in this heart ... that’s waiting in this heart Jared’s head jerked up at that, and the sad smile hovering around Jensen’s lips made him shift in his chair. “I sure noticed … something,” he answered a little vague, and Jensen managed a grin. “Thought you wouldn’t if I kept my distance.” Jared scrunched up his nose. “That’s what I noticed, Jen. That you keep away – and to be honest, I don’t like it. Not even a little. Took me years to get you out of your shell, and all of a sudden you just crawl back in there like a fucking sea turtle!” Jensen raised an eyebrow at that comparison, and Sadie took her head out of Jared’s lap and left the kitchen. “You think I’m a turtle?” Jensen asked with an amused little smile, and Jared shot him a glare. “Totally, dude. Wanna tell me what’s up with you lately?” Temptation leave us alone – cause I know you’re always there But white lies can weigh like a stone And in this world I hear them everywhere Jensen’s hands around the coffee cup tensed, and Jared bit his lip. “Just in case I can help – you know. I don’t like you to keep secrets. I thought we were best friends … and best friends don’t keep secrets.” Jared was vaguely aware of the fact that he sounded like a twelve-year old, but he didn’t care. He took the cup from Jensen’s hands, took a sip and gave it back, and when Jensen just stared at him, realization dawned. They were sitting in the kitchen in the middle of the night, sharing a cup of coffee, like … like friends. Only Jared felt inexplicably warm and fuzzy when his fingers touched Jensen’s while giving the cup back to him. Maybe they had stopped being friends a long time ago. Maybe keeping up the pretence of friendship was what Jensen had been doing these past few weeks. One little white lie, one lie One white lie tears us apart One white lie won’t stop the love That’s waiting in this heart ... that’s waiting in this heart “You … you’re not alone in this,” Jared said quietly, put his hand on Jensen’s knee like he would have done – like he did do – before things got weird, and Jensen looked down and stared at it like it set him on fire. And maybe it did. Jared knew their friendship was over from the heat in Jensen’s stare, and he swallowed audibly. “We’re together in this, Jen. If … if you want us to be.” Jensen just nodded, and that was all Jared needed. He got up from his chair, took the coffee cup from Jensen’s hands and put it away on the counter. Their first kiss was shy, gentle, and almost chaste – but once Jared gained confidence from Jensen not pulling away, he put his hands on Jensen’s cheeks, stroked the hint of stubble he found there with his thumbs, and let go. One lie, one lie One little white lie, one white lie One white lie, one little white lie Neither of them noticed when the cup fell to the floor and broke. The End Hosted by Animexx e.V. (http://www.animexx.de)