senseless occupation von P3rs3phon3 (creepy cookie brain escape) ================================================================================ Kapitel 1: failed at life ------------------------- her talkative taciturnity filling the room her glace striving your eyes her eyes glimming in the moonlight her innocence seducing your soul ~you know she´s not meant to die tonight~ she doesn´t know who you are you know if she does she wouldn´t be with you she´s trusting you the deathliest oldest nightshade around ~you know she´s a lost sheep~ her neck paler than ever before her blood pulsing underneath you´re able to taste in on your tongue you´re still refusing to give in ~but your addiction is stronger~ you close your eyes you mustn´t give in you have to resist you don´t want to kill her ~she´s the only one you´ve ever loved before~ the beast beneath your reason is awaking all for her blood´s sake your reason to live for God´s sake why can´t you die? ~you´re asking yourself what´s worth living for unconcious of your doings~ your eyes are open again the taste of blood floating your mouth the jerking body in your arms you´re feeling the life fading away ~you´ve killed your world´s worth~ the cold corpse in your hands her blood warm but liveless raising yourself up you can´t deny your instict is stronger you have to admit your addiction lasts longer Is that all? you failed at life, corazón... Kapitel 2: Life´s a stage ------------------------- The day that she saw her she knew she won´t leave her she knew she´ll be the one the girl like a gun THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE ´N´LOSS THIN LINE BETWEEN SLAVE ´N´BOSS THIN LINE TO WALK ON THIN LINE TO STAY STRONG A NOWADAYS´FAIRYTALE NEVERENDING LEGEND OF LOVE you know that you knew her before rebirth wonder? Nevermind. fate or accident? Some of a kind. you don´t I don´t we don´t know Life´s a stage enjoy the show THIN LINE BETWEEN LOVE ´N´LOSS THIN LINE BETWEEN SLAVE ´N´BOSS THE SAME STORY AGAIN AND AGAIN THE SAME STORY ACCORDING TO A PLAN SOMEONE SEEMS TO USE THE STRINGS EVERYTIME THE SHOW BEGINS you know you acted this part once before Doesn´t matter we have to play, No one minds we have to pay, for everything he wants us to do Can´t change it neither me nor you so go on playing pretending to feel, go on laughing pretending it´s real, go on hoping, pretending not to know, go on dying, pretending to go... YOU WILL ALWAYS BE REBORN IN THIS SHOW CAN´T HELP IT DON´T TRY TO...it´s in vain different faces, different names, different problems, different games... BUT AT LEAST YOU KNOW THE ENSEMBLE Kapitel 3: Happy Past Valentine ------------------------------- 17.02.2009 13:23 message to Drake last week´s sleepless nights and plessure all for your sake You´re able to make a women smile and cry at one time... You can twist her around your finger... You can swear your love without thinking your emotional speech over... You can talk and write about things you´d never do in reality forgetting to tell her... Pretending to be the hard and bad guy she never wanted you to be... You can leave her in a false illusion of love... Till its too late... But the worst thing is that this woman isn´t even angry about it... She loves her loveable small baka under the dark cover of strength... And she will wait even for the bad answer of decision against her... She will stay beside you... Caring for you... If there´s ever no space left under your wings... She will fly up above you and the ones you´re going to save in future... She will spread her wings to save you all and shield you in times your wings seem to break under the selfmade weight... Not caring of herself even if its stupid... But she´ll offer anything that nothing happens to you... Like her nee-san she will still smile and let the world wonder why... Because she´s happy just being with you... her smile a sword cutting through doubt and fear... You´re in the inner circle of her heart... A place where just a few people´s existence is justified... Not much space left for anyone new even though her heart is sometimes said to be unbelievebly huge... She doesn´t know if that´s right... But in the outta circle there´s soon nearly an overpopulation... There are so many people meaning together everything to her... Chained on the buttom of her heart are the few hatred ones who tried or are still trying harm her beloveds... The most unforgiveable crime...especially hurting her dearest persons... (Burn and die there buddies...) ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ So now you know more about the strange ways my heart`s constructed... I don´t know why I was talking in the third person all the time...excuse it... It´s up to you now to guess where you are right now... Maybe in the inner circle... A clue: Three persons being there will never be able to read this here @ animexx... Oh by the way @ the one definately knowing that he´s meant in the first passage: As long as you´re not sure about anything don´t speak about love again in front of another women if you don´t want to hurt her... Don´t speak about things you don´t want to do in fact forgetting to clear this... Hearts are flying faster to your feet as you think... Kapitel 4: Beginning of a love story destined to fail ----------------------------------------------------- This is a story of two people meeting each other unfortunately they will mix up love and another feeling the time you´ll read this, their path has already been parted but read how easy life seems to look for lovers... But why do I know the ending? I was part of it months ago... And know I wish it would have never happened... +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 180 mins of wooden sleep than a dream made my flesh creep heart´s beating, breath goes fast caleidoscope of hidden past Waking up and ´Jazz is different` Sun shines brightly, volume´s decent Breakfast to Placebo´s sound snow´s outside all around a headache, yes, my head goes boom, all alone here in her room the night was long, the night was worth it, ´cause finally we killed this nitwit Qouted from the LORD OF WEED Don Bilbo´s world of crack and speed, senselessly lost in middle earth wondering what we deserve an RPG discovered feelings dissatisfied just with calmly breathings started kissing gingerly lying there excitedly "strange" your word of yesterday explination´s left to stray the touch of wings made me awake my smiles today all for your sake Your dark feathers´re still tickling me on purpose, don´t they? :D Kapitel 5: Tentacle Pan Cakes ----------------------------- Senseless Songtext about one of the greatest days of my life Neji♥ I´ll promise no one will understand it but us... ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ You and me jumpin´to Nirvana You and me doing what we wanna You and me singing to Green Day You and me and a table to lay Taking photos of pan cakes Tentacle Pan Cakes - what a day! Tentacle Pan Cakes - happy dismay Making pan cakes a cat and the nephew of devil You and me watching blackbirds You and me "cute that it hurts" You and me writing a list You and me pen in the fist writing about pan cakes Tentacle Pan Cakes - greatest lunch Tentacle Pan Cakes - TENTACLE PUNCH!! XoX Feeding a loaf of pan cakes what a bad habit You and me and dancing kings You and me whatever `day brings You and me, slave and master, You and me, the perfect disaster power unit of pan cakes Tentacle Pan Cakes - cookin´ accident Tentacle Pan Cakes - horror for a dent´ laughing about pan cakes cuddling you, Baby! You and me, a cross and a screw, You and me, whatever we do, You and me, a thief and a guard, You and me, sometimes it´s hard, not to think about pan cakes Tantacle Pan Cakes - watching you cutely Tantacle Pan Cakes - ideal of beauty our weekend of pan cakes so much time to spend You and me, yaoi addicted, You and me, forever restricted, You and me, foolish and crazy, You and me, fucked off and lazy, dreaming ´bout pan cakes... Kapitel 6: Graveyard of Dead Butterflies ---------------------------------------- Is it all over? Whom´s fault? Mine? Yours? ...ours? Is it all gone? Nothing left but tears and sadness? All the two years in vain? Just a big graveyard of dead butterflies? I can´t believe it... I knew it from the beginning... As I walked through my door in the afternoon... You were just lying there... No movement, no happy greeting, no kiss, no unpatience... Keeping silent, not saying a word... The sadness in your eyes made me fear the worst... Unfortunately I had been right... You don´t love me anymore... You´re not sure whether there´s something left... I started crying although I knew your feelings exactly ´cause I felt them many months ago...but I had reasons that had been changed, you knew them... I had been fallen in love again...very badly this time, but now it seems to be your turn...even if you don´t know what`s wrong between us... Yes, we are extraordinary different, but thats what has kept us together all the time... You said you need my direct way to tell my feelings and thoughts... You would love it... If it´s not my character at all what´s wrong then? You loved my body... You loved my voice... You loved my thoughts in poetry and conversation... What to hell is it? You said there´s a development tearing as apart... You couldn´t take me to your parties and friends, because they seem to rough... You can´t drink with me til your dellirium, because I´m always worried... But you´d know my reasons to worry you ´d know what has happened to yourself so thats ok... SO WHAT´S WRONG? We were on the best way to have a few same friends... We were on parties without my worries... There had been even family plannings... We loved us... What has happened to us? Indeed I´d love to know it... Kapitel 7: love & insanity -------------------------- Love and Insanity belong together since the first Tea Party ever yawning Boredom demanded activity "let´s play a game!", answered Insanity They all were explained the rules of "Hide and Seek" but Cravenness´Courage was to weak Truth refused to hide herself so they stayed watching on a shelf The other guests agreed to play The Enthusiam was shouting "Hooray!" while Insanity´s counting they started to hide - anywhere - but sheer outta his sight hidden in a rose´s briar captured there like in a wire Love was waiting quietly while he´s searching patiently till his patience turned to worry still found were Happiness and Glory every hide should be searched through nothing else was left to do But Ambition handicapped Success and Accident fought Luckiness Malevolence spoiled Felicity´s fun and Jealousy made Charity run Insight and Intellect couldn´t work together Egoism said "Help without advantage? -NEVER!" Deciding to search on his own Insanity was left to find her alone Finally he saw a briar her seize stabbed in with a stick but gouged out her eyes! so Love´s day turned to night and he felt sorry for her plight Since that day he´s her fellow guiding her through deep and shallow "Because of me you´ve lost you sight, I´ll promise you to be you light!" Kapitel 8: You -------------- my dear, my love, my everything, my heart, my life, my darling, my liberty, my song to sing, my time and space, my other wing, I´ll love you till the end of time I´ll promise you believe me but we arrived the end of rhyme I hope you will forgive me ♥ Kapitel 9: Neverland 1 ---------------------- If being adult means to live a false illusion... + I don´t want to grow up + If being adult means to give up the child within... + I will stay infantly forever + If being adult means to lose wishes and dreames + I won´t ever awake again + Peter Pan, take me away, I want to be your fellow-stray please, I´m begging, do it, I won´t surrender to it Peter Pan, take me away, I wish to dream, I want to play, please, I´m begging, try it, You´ll save my tear to dry it Peter, dude, I want to fly, Peter, I won´t live this lie, I´m not afraid of Captain Hook, but of any housewifes´look Peter, buddy, take me home, in your world I want to roam, Peter, please, send fairy´s dust, Peter, please, be sure to trust Peter, boy, my world is strange, merrily I want to range, but, Peter, there´s so much forbidden, most important pleasures hidden Tiger Lilly, Tinkerbell - take away this living hell! Peter, fellow, mercy, please growing up is a disease! If being adult means to be like them... + I´ll promise to kill them with my smile + Kapitel 10: Neverland 2 ----------------------- Deary, dreary Captain Hook , embodiment of adult´s boredom, You´re persuing Peter Pan, the symbol of childish freedom, wanna kill him, wanna get him, but you´re failing every try, wanna catch him, wanna stop him, but he´s still up in the sky, Deary, dreary Captain Fail, Loser-Pirate Neverland´s, as in every fairytale crocodile´s in Peter´s hands wanna flee it, wanna beat it, but there´s still a ticking noise, wanna cook it, wanna burn it, Believe in you - you´ve got the choise "It´s a pleasure watching you, but Captain, don´t you want me to release you from this dreadful beast, maybe I´d help at least, all alone in Neverland, you seem to need my helping hand, if you won´t leave and still return, this will be your final turn!", said Peter to you once ago, your anger´s burning down below, your pride forbids abandoning, while Peter starts again to sing: "Captain, childhood is a gift, Don´t know if you got my drift, but once gone it won´t return, you´ve got many things to learn" Kapitel 11: Dear Soul Brother Mine ---------------------------------- Text to Martin 17th June 2009 Don´t be sad because of me ´cause I´m used to be Unhappy Don´t want you to be unhappy too brother mine I´ll care for you I´ll be there, too If shodow´s harming Brother, dear, I´ll keep you here safe in my heart Having each other let´s be happy together even if the whole world seems to mind it Kapitel 12: Tale of two people ------------------------------ Once there had been a boy and a girl she was his mistress and he was her world her disciple and her were connected by mind London Bridge´s fallin´ and three mice got blind they promised to care whenever one´s in need they promised to dare in fate they will meet seeing the moon they start to think of each other missing each soon she wants to be with her brother Hugging and cuddling never want to let go they stand there huddling not afraid to show their kind of caring their way of daring against the crowd she started to shout: Let us be as we want to you´ll never understand what connects us - not you Kapitel 13: Under the Cherry - Tree~♥ to Lisa --------------------------------------------- Sitting there in a cherry tree the one I want to save If you won´t come down right here will be my grave Waiting in the pouring rain Watching you just a shadow of yourself Sacrificing both our health Staying in the pouring rain It´s always raining when we´re sad There´s a tempest when we´re mad weather control Coming down you´re shivering Gone seems all my everything promising to never leave you Hugging you not saying a word Silence cutting like a sword New wounds in the elder Tears and rain, your face shines wetly Your taciturnity keeps silent sadly While we´re hiding in the garden A crow is croaking on a tree some others on the roof to see keep watching over us You want me to go I denied doing so even if I´m "catching a cold" as you say Under your tears it´s hard to breath "Soulmate, I never want to leave" A kiss as a seal of eternal shelter Hate your parents for what they´ve done There´s nothing left, trust is all gone No one´s allowed to hurt you Moon´s nursery is sung Come on, dear, the day is young don´t waste your time by thinking of them Remember: "Tonight you´ll see your most beloved!" Kapitel 14: The ICQ Poem ------------------------ The ICQ Poem Cutting down the connection leaving me in furious affection hate you eating up important information failing in every situation damn you Departing me from the one I love Stop it now I´ve had enough I´ll make you die you make me sigh wanna cry: FUCK YOU ICQ Kapitel 15: Ode to my Brother ----------------------------- Oh brother mine, why are you so far away? why can´t I see you everyday? why do I sing if you can´t hear it´s loneliness I have to fear Oh brother mine, I want to be beside you,oh I want to flee my world, your world, everything I wish in our world I´m free to sing whatever moves my heart now... Kapitel 16: Missing someone --------------------------- Missing Missing is a disease with no healing You´ll say there is one but I say it won´t last long The painful way of missing is never ending as long as you love but take it as a proof that you do ´cause love is more than missing and the one you love more than any pain could count... A never ending story A devil´s circle loving and missing Medicine and Symptome living and dying for someone both never leaving you as long there´s at least one person you love If it dosn´t exsist- you´re not alive anymore... Kapitel 17: The Cherry Tree Song -------------------------------- The beech tree heals wounds The oak keeps you strong The willow feels with you The fir sings along The pine tree defends you The birch you can trust The maple keeps secrets Ancient barks, they won´t rust The apple tree carries wishes The pear tree makes fun The plum tree will fool you while enjoying the sun There´s some one forgotten? Oh no, fool, it´s not but in some minds it´s rotten they´ve forgotten a lot One tree in my garden masters it all Queen of my meadow growing there tall Friend of my childhood With whispering blossoms your trunk understood the problems I hold Your fruits and you seed fallen down deeply I used to eat in your shadow once sleepy I told you my secrets I told you their lies Your leaves would be changing as my shape would rise Your boughs and your branches took away all my fears Your buds, leaves and blossoms always catching my tears Who needs all those trees if he´s got one like you? Whatever they can You, Cherry, could, too. You´ve been my best friend through all these years You will never bend yourself for apples or pears Your daughters are red look, some are quite round and over my head the blowing wind´s sound I´ll keep on singing all summer long the endlessly lasting Cherry Tree Song Kapitel 18: Mommy´s Lullaby --------------------------- Sleep well, my dear Mommy´s still here, watching you... butterflies protect your dreams, nothing will be as it seems, here in the world of time... nothingness keeps sinking slowly, into all you worthy, holy, thoughts turning them into the world you want to live in~ Good night, my heart, your sleep should start, before the brandnew morning... Hope you will meet the unknown, all the unshown, this world can´t give you.. Daddy loves you, Mommy, too, laying all our love in you... So my Darling, close your eyes, the moon is watching, old and wise, be kind to him, so he is happy making you all tired and nappy, wanting children now to sleep, so the evening breeze will weep and nurse you, so you´re feeling save from the cradle to your grave... Kapitel 19: love trade ---------------------- Giving and taking receiving and making being glad for what you get for giving trying to offer more than your heart right from the start love trade paying a touch with a kiss sending thoughts if you miss the other one apparently gone but never forever love´s shade a kiss means more than a touch but no word as much as a smile for while lasting in your heart hate´s blade nothing´s worth the same not even if you claim it wasn´t meant the way it goes only the reaction shows which feeling was given lovers rate a part of life often missunderstood so what if you would want just to give for the others to live refusing to get making them sad trouble...selfmade the other way wrong the whole time as long as you can´t except you have to pay for every hug and every "Hey!" at least with smile as an answer to make it stay heaven´s gate so do lovers and their friends holding hands selling a kiss for some bliss just to give it right away to the next along their way just to sate no one is immune to love getting on a cloud above but for the most different reasons as the seasons passing by growing hate so if you get nothing but you´re giving you are doing something wrong as the others never getting as their refuse keeps being strong never too late so start tomorrow selling bliss keep on smiling stop to dis but just to those deserving it the ones thanking every bit with at least a gesture of felicity somewhere to find if you closely see if you know the trade Kapitel 20: Maze of my Mind --------------------------- Come... climb the hedge or solve the riddle find your way into the middle of my mind keep on listening, keep on trying clues are helpful, but they´re lying try it blind the red string around your finger leads you to the strangest singer somewhere behind So... Follow the signs, jump over the hill Escape the tendrils trying to kill maze of my mind the most beautiful blossoms are deadly within the will to survive is hidden by sin or some of that kind Never eat what´s suffered Never drink what´s offered I´ll feed you afterwards I´m sure somewhen you´ll find the real me beneath... Kapitel 21: Fly --------------- Come out... Emerge your egg and start to fly you won´t regret it if you try ready dried you´ll spread your wings wondering what new daylight brings Freedom Escape the care of mother´s shadow Fly above the greenest meadow end of childhood - fully grown finally all on your own Independence You´ll leave the scared and half tormented Being curious is never rented "What if he won´t return?" Nescience bothers, worries burn Nonsense Does a bird ever return to the nest it´s born? No... But that is it what seperates birds from human beings... WE will always return to the one making us fly once... If they deserve it. If they are worth it. Kapitel 22: tired ----------------- TIRED - eyes closing stars twinkling and posing they want me to sleep it´s hard to keep my eyes open SLEEP - drowning in dreams diving in - seems like I don´t want to awake and stay in my make- belief forever NIGHTMARE - I´m not aware of you - should I dare to conquer, to beat your seat in my head? NO - sweet dream or bad I´m glad to be able to have at least one of them... Hosted by Animexx e.V. (http://www.animexx.de)