three little words von abgemeldet ================================================================================ Three little words 'I love you' When he said these three words it send a wave of joy and happiness through me.Never in my whole life I felt so happy... just because of three little words... I literally hung in his arms,telling him that I feel the same... I feared that this was a dream,that this was not really happening... But when I realized it was really happening... I backed away a little... trying to hide my nervousness... And then he just smiled... and all I could do was look at him... look into his eyes...losing myself in them... I must have looked like a stupid schoolgirl fully in love... But I didn't mind... I was too happy... This feeling... it's hard to describe... Then it happened...our first kiss.He was so gentle...His arms around my waist... his lips on mine... How long have I waited for this moment... My knees felt weak... I thought I would fall... but I knew he was there to catch me... For the first time in my life I felt safe... and loved... I still can't believe I fell for my best friend. The next day I woke up with a strange yet nice fluffy feeling inside.I couldn't wait to see him again.All the way to practise I had a silly smile on my face.I hadn't even realized I was still grinning stupidly until Kohta suddenly asked me why I'm so happy. I shot a quick glance into Aiji's direction then looked back at Kohta asking him if it's a crime just to be happy.He just smiled slightly and went outside,probably to smoke. Again I looked towards Aiji but when I saw this frown on his face I started to worry a little.Was everything alright? Have I done something wrong? He walked into the next room and motioned for me to follow.So I did and shut the door behind us. There he looked at me seriously and said "Jun,we have to be careful with this.They shouldn't know...Not know... How would they react? " He tried to act calmly but I saw that he was kind of worried about 'us'. This 'us' just excisted since the evening before. But I understood.We really had to be careful.Because of our band.Because of our friends. So I simply nodded and bit my lip.He then looked at me with a gentle smile. "I know it's not easy... I would like to tell them how happy I am. Cause I really AM happy..." he said blushing slightly.He then wrapped me in a tight embrace whispering those three words I so wanted to hear again from his lips. "Let's just wait with this a little..okey?" he said almost pleadingly while still holding onto my hands.I just nodded again and smiled at him.Relieved,he smiled back and gave me a soft kiss on the lips. "Let's go back...they may begin to wonder where we are" He gave me another tender smile before opening the door and heading back into the main practise area. I remainded where I was for a few moments,thinking about the current situation,before I went out as well. Upon entering the room,I noticed my bandmates looking from me to Aiji curiously.You could just about see those question marks floating above their heads.I merely smiled and went back to my guitar stand while Aiji went outside the studio for a smoke. Evereything went to normal again.Nearly everything... In the following days and weeks,we often met after practise.Some nights we went out drinking in bars and clubs.Other nights we ended up staying either at his or my place.He often stayed over night with me,leaving early in the morning so we wouldn't show up together for practise. It was a strange situation for both of us but we knew that it's the best way for now.We were happy and we loved each other.That was the most important thing. One day I was at Aiji's and suddenly there was a knock at the door.It was Kirito.He walked in after Aiji and began to say 'Hi' but stopped when he saw me.Aiji quickly explained that I had come over because we wanted to practise some songs,which luckily was enough to satisfy Kirito's curiousity and he left after a little bit of small talk. We often used the songwriting excuse or something along those lines when one of our bandmates dropped by and discovered us together. Luckily they believed us.Or at least we thought they did.... Several days later, I was taking a small break outside,enjoying the fresh air that came after the rainy night, when I noticed that Takeo had come out to join me.When I turned to smile at him I noticed the look he had on his face.It was an 'I-know-there's-something-going-on-and-whether-you-tell-me-or-not-i-will-find-out'-look. I mentally shuddered but I just gave him one of my brightest smiles and asked how he was going.He remained silent,watching me carefully.After what seemed to be the longest moments of my life,he finally spoke: "Ne Jun... you and Aiji are hanging out a lot these days hm?" I felt how myself grow pale, but i tried to continue smiling,just like the genki Jun he knew. "Huh? Ah we told ya,we are practising some songs and stuff.."I said cheerfully.Not TOO cheerfully Jun... He just looked at me with a little smirk " Hontou ni? It's not as if you two were doing this a lot in past..." I swallowed hard and hoped he wouldn't noticed, as I giggled nervously "Hey aren't best friends allowed to do some stuff together? You and Kohta hang out a lot too" Smile Jun..smile I thought to myself as I tried to look innocently at him. "Hmm.. true... But I have a girlfriend.Same with Kohta..." he smiled back just as innocently,but now raising an eyebrow. "As for you two... You don't have someone right? So it's a little strange to see you two acting so happy around each other and stuff. " I stared at him,dumbfounded. Was it that obvious? He seemed to sense my uncomfortableness and smiled at me " Ne Jun.. Don't worry it isn't that obvious.I doubt the others noticed this little...ehm... change between you and Aiji already." I still could only stare at him.Did he really found out? "Jun... If there's really something between you and Aiji beyond friendship... " he smiled. "Then... why don't you let us know? " he asked,looked steadily at me. I couldn't meet his gaze so I kept staring at the ground,thinking.Suddenly I feared that i would lose Aiji.That I would lose my place in the band.Hell I thought of all the worse case scenarios, when suddenly Aiji appeared "Oh here you.. are." He stared at Takeo and at the slightly pained expression on my face " Is.. everything..okay?" he asked haltingly.Takeo just smiled and patted me on my shoulder saying "Think about it Jun... We don't live in the middle ages anymore.." and with that he started walking back inside,grinning at Aiji before disappearing from our view. Aiji was now the one looking dumbfounded.I gazed at him for several moments before my legs weakened and I slowly slid down the wall and onto the floor. Immideately Aiji was at my side, looking at me with concern in his eyes. "Ne are you okay? Did something happen? What did Takeo mean by that?" I could feel tears starting to form within my eyes.I tried to fight them back and tell him about this conversation I had with Takeo without getting too upset.But when I opened my mouth to say something,I felt a tear make it's way slowly down my cheek.I finally gave in and started to sob quietly, looking down towards the ground. "Jun?? Are you okay? Why are you crying?" I could tell he was worried.I cried and burried my face in my hands, not daring to look at him as I felt him gently taking me in a tight embrace. "Jun.. please don't cry...It hurts to see you cry...Please tell me what happened..." "...he..Takeo..he..knows about it... he knows..about us..." I said between sobs.I could feel him staring at me. "Jun..." He began...Was he angry now? Suddenly he took away my hands from my face and made me look at him. I looked into his soft eyes for a moment before looking away again "I'm sorry.."I said weakly. He put a finger under my chin and moved my face to look at him again. " Why are you sorry...? Is it because he found out about us? " I could only nod in response. " No Jun..I should apalogize to you..." What? Why? I wondered and looked at him again. "I'm sorry Jun..I just wanted to wait with this... till I got to know how they would react,you know..if they would kill us or anything like that" he laughed a little but then went back to being serious. " I just wanted to make sure that when we tell them...that they will understand...that I wouldn't lose you" he whispered. "You know..." he settled himself down on the ground beside me as I continued to just watch him and listen. "The night after we..told each other how we feel.." he began again,smiling a little "...that night I had a nightmare" his smile then faded as he continued " I dreamed that we had let them know about our relationship,but they didn't understand. They looked at us as if we were freaks. The media had found out too... We weren't able to meet even in private. Kirito got mad and accused us of trying to destroy the band.Everything was just really terrible... I lost the band...But what was even worse was that I lost you..." he bit his lip and looked back at me as a single tear was sliding down his beautiful face.I immideately wiped it away with the palm of my hand and suddenly felt the urge to hug him.I wanted to hold him tightly and never let go. He seemed to be feeling the same way because he suddenly leaned forward and hugged me.I used this opportunity to work my way onto his lap,holding him close.I whispered those three little words into his ear,smiling all the time.I didn't need to see his face to know that he was smiling too. After resting a while peacefully in each others arms,we finally decided it was time to head back into the studio.Once again our bandmates looked at us curiously,all except Takeo who just grinned at us.I smiled back at him whole-heartedly before glancing at Kirito and Kohta,who were still staring at us.They had a good reason to stare as Aiji and I were standing there with hands still linked. It felt strange...but somehow it was a nice feeling.Finally we could show them how happy we were,although we were still unsure how they would react... but this moment of uncertainty was replaced by a slight blush on my face when Kirito suddenly spoke up grinning "Aahh...i see...I wondered about you two...Man,not even I spend this much time working on songs!" he said with a smirk which was followed with a burst of laughter from Kohta. I looked at Aiji and saw that he was also relieved.You could almost see the weight being lifted from his shoulders and i had the feeling that the rest of the day was going to be very nice.Now we didn't had to hide our relationship anymore.This 'us' finally was official. It's been 6 months to the day since we had told the rest of the band about our relationship.That night found us at a bar listening to an obviously drunk guy doing karaoke.6 months later and we are still together and still in love...A thought that made me smile. Kirito and Kohta make their way towards the karaoke machine telling us to be prepared for a 'great' show.As soon as they hit the first notes we all burst out laughing.They were much drunker then the guy singing previously,and it was definitely obvious.I was grinning at the drunken antics of the two brothers when I suddenly felt arms encircle my waist from behind.Slowly I relaxed and melted into the embrace before I turned around to look into Aiji's face as he smiled at me lovingly.Again all I could do was just stare into those soft brown eyes,losing myself within their depths. "Ouch..!!" yelped Kohta suddenly.He had just stumbled across the stage and ended up falling on his ass.I laughed at the sight of a drunken Kirito attempting to help up a wincing and even more drunken Kohta.What a pair of dumbasses I thought to myself as i snickered;all of a sudden i felt a pair of lips on my cheek.I turned my head around and those lips moved to my own,meeting them in a gentle kiss. I heard someone snicker...Probably Kirito...Who cares... I threw away all these thoughts.I just want to enjoy this moment with him. Hoping it would never end... ~owari Hosted by Animexx e.V. (http://www.animexx.de)